ACW 166 – Step Away from the Scale, Woman.


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I know there are some people out there right now who are rolling their eyes and thinking, “Who the hell is she kidding? She’s not fat!” To all you kind, kind people out there, thank you. Now convince my scale of that.

In all seriousness, the last month or so has been very hectic, just as hectic as the few months previous. In fact, I’m considering renaming the time period from January up through May as one extra-long month known as “Hectic.” Although maybe “Hell Month” would be a better designation. I did better this year in terms of keeping up with exercise. After last year’s “Hectic,” my blood pressure shot up thirty point and I had constant headaches. I didn’t want a repeat of that so I made sure to get in some sort of exercise everyday. But I also did what I usually do when I get stressed, and that’s eat. Because even though I know I shouldn’t, I use food to reward myself for surviving a really tough time. And when part of that tough time involves Girl Scout cookies… Well, you can figure it out.

Anyway, I am not really FAT, but I have put on some weight, more than is comfortable for me. And it’s not the number on the scale that bothers me so much as the way my clothes fit. I am very stingy when it comes to spending money on clothes for myself. I don’t like to pay a bazillion dollars for a new pair of jeans. I can recall back in college when I got sticker shock over buying jeans that cost me $20, and they don’t make jeans that cost a measly $20 these days! So I buy clothes that will last and then I do my best to make damn sure I’ll fit into them so long as they hold together. Those of you who have seen me know that I’ll even convert a favorite pair of jeans into a floor-length skirt, and while that’s partly because I love floor-length skirts, it’s also because I’m a damned tight-wad when it comes to buying new clothes.

(Unless it’s t-shirts from Threadless, but even then I wait for their $10 sales.)

So after I got over the shock of realizing that I’d packed on more than a few pounds on my rear-end, I got busy doing something about it. I made a few changes to my diet –  no more soda, a glass of wine only once a week, only one cup of coffee a day, water the rest of the day, two servings of fruit and/or vegetables at every meal, and if I’m absolutely dying for chocolate then I can make myself a big glass of chocolate soy milk rather than raid the pantry for a bag of M&Ms.

In addition, I’ve made an effort to exercise twice a day –  an hour in the morning at the Y and then another half hour or so in the evenings with the Wii. My copies of Just Dance have been dusted off and I’m making the kids get up and dance with me, which they only sort of hate. And if the Hubster comes home and finds us dancing, then he’ll join right in and that 30 minutes will easily become an hour or more as he and I compete to see who does the best Katy Perry imitation (I cannot stand it when he beats me at “California Girls”).

The results? In the last two weeks, a couple pounds have come off. Of course, I’m getting ready to go on another trip again, away from my beloved Y and my Wii, so I’m really going to have to be careful what I eat while I’m gone and make certain I get out and walk every day while I’m away. I don’t want to back-slide after two weeks of hard work. If you hear someone screaming obscenities at a scale, you’ll know I failed in that. But if you hear someone whoop it up as she beats her husband soundly in Just Dance, then you’ll know I succeeded in dropping another pound.

Anyway, have fun this week! I’m going to enjoy a glass of chocolate soy milk now.

About Cynical Woman

Cartoonist, Artist, Geek, Evil Crafter, Girl Scout Troop Leader and Writer. Also, a zombie. I haven't slept in I don't know how long.
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