The Black Thumb Rides Again

If there were a world court of crimes against gardening, I would be tried and convicted of murder.

I have a perpetual black thumb. If there is a way to kill a plant, I will find it. Even silk florals have died at my hands. But every year, I still keep trying to establish a garden.

This year, I’m having a bit of success, though not the success I was expecting. The tomato plants I started indoors sprouted up beautifully at first then died before I could get them into the ground outside. The herb seeds I buried in pots never even tried to grow, so I’ve got four empty pots sitting out in the yard right now. I don’t know why I keep watering them.

But I have had some successes. First, the melon and pumpkin seeds I started have really taken off. Crazy person that I am, I’m growing these in a couple of 4×4 foot plots. I know, that’s not a lot of room for melons and pumpkins, but careful research has led me to believe that I can grow these vining plants on a TRELLIS! So, we’re trying that…

Trellises

My crazy trellised garden!

As you can see, I’ve already set up slings for a couple of the melons that have started growing. I’m going to have to get more cheese cloth, and probably something stronger than that, as these babies grow, but right now things look promising.

Melons!

Melons in slings! When they get bigger, I’ll train them to walk on the high wire!

The pumpkins will be put in slings too. The type of pumpkin I’m growing is supposed to turn out blue when they’re full grown, so I’m looking forward to having pumpkins that match my hair!

Pumpkin!

One day, this will be a lovely blue pumpkin!

Other than that, I’ve had some success with radishes and turnips (making me feel like I’m participating in a real-life version of Rune Factory). And the zucchini has finally started growing too. Now if I can just keep up with harvesting and cooking what I grow, things will be great!

Zucchini

I have grown a loverly zucchini!

And if it all goes south… well, I need a place to set up a graveyard in October anyway. What better than a plot of land filled with the remains of all my latest victims?

Bring Out Your Dead – 10 April, The Black Thumb Rides Again

I have no pictures for today’s blog post, because the topic of today’s blog post is too horrifying for pictures.

I’ve started gardening again.

Feel that chill that just ran up and down your spine? That’s the Black Thumb saying, “Hey there!”

Anyway, gardening is one of those thing that I’m doing to take back my life. It lets me spend time outside, gives me plenty of fresh air and sunshine, and it’s good exercise. So about a month ago, I bought some seeds and a couple of those instant green house kits and told myself, “Yeah! I can do this!” Of course, I completely ignored my long history of gardening disasters when I did this. I took my purchase home, set up my little green house, pulled out a notebook and planned my future garden with a little song in my heart.

And after 4 weeks, all I had was four tiny little sprouts. But I was proud of my sprouts, and I tended to them so carefully! When I realized last night it was going to be too cold to keep them on the window sill, I moved them to a SAFE PLACE!! SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SAFE!!!!

And when i got up the next morning, I discovered one of the cats had ripped out all four of my babbies by the roots and left them to die in the dirt.

So next week, when it’s warm enough to keep plants outside, I’m going back to the garden store and I’m buying all new seedlings. And then we’ll see how many I can kill off.

The End