Nothing funny today. I’m just rambling to clear my head and figure some things out.
All last week was just off in terms of getting things done. I’m the kind of idiot that prefers to get up very early and get a jump on the day, but last week was pretty hard. It may be because I tried to run right back into my usual exercise routine after getting the go ahead from my doctor. I didn’t think I had done anything all that hard though. I did a day at the Y and a day at the dojo and then I crashed for the rest of the week. I could barely make myself go for a walk. And as for getting up at the butt-crack of dawn? Forget it.
Worse still, I’ve been dead tired all week, and when I’m tired, my will power is at an all time low. I eat things I know I shouldn’t. It doesn’t help that Michael’s been stocking up on Ben and Jerry’s ice cream. As a matter of fact, we went shopping on Thursday and he tried to convince me to get more ice cream. I don’t know what he’s up to, but I said no. It’s bad enough I’ve been eating a small bowl of the stuff every evening. I need to quit before it gets to be a real problem.
I made myself get out of bed this morning at 5:30 AM, even though I was wiped out from nursing Sam all night. I got up, showered, dressed, and started on my morning chores. I was hoping to sneak in 15 minutes on the stationary bike in there, but Sam woke Michael so now I’m back in the glider nursing her again. Must be a growth spurt.
Time to get my ass back on track. I’ve had one bad week and I need to pull myself together. I have better, more productive days as a mom and as a writer/artist when I just get up early, do the chores, and stay awake all day to get the work done. Evenings are what’s been killing me, I think, because I can’t get to sleep soon enough. I’m starting to think that maybe what I need to do is just accept the fact that Sam is going to be in bed with me all night and just start nursing her there at 8:30 PM. Then we’d both be in bed and we could both go to sleep. I may try that tonight. We’ll see how it goes.