Yes, she actually said this to me. This from the kid who was once asked by her pediatrician, “Young lady, how many chins do you intend to grow?!”

You just wait. The joke’s on her. That butt runs in the family.

Where to start with this one? Um, how about with “I’m very opinionated”?

Seriously, I had two choices of what to draw for this week – something cute and funny or something more controversial. I’m not usually in-your-face with my political and (lack of) religious views, but there are times when I feel it’s necessary to point out a few things. For starters, I believe I have the right to express myself politically and sexually. For a woman, the two are so intertwined I can’t see how to separate one from the other. It’s to the point where I’m not just writing erotica to turn out steamy sex scenes for entertainment and profit. I’m writing erotica because that’s my way of saying, “Fuck all you people who think I should be meek and mild and obedient and hide in the kitchen while being barefoot and pregnant. I’m a woman with a brain and a cunt and I intend to use them both!” (And no, I will never apologize for using the word ‘cunt,’ just as a man would never apologize for calling his penis a ‘dick’).

Secondly, I actually am thankful for the things I listed in the cartoon above. In a different time and place, under different circumstance, my life would be a lot different, and probably not for the better. I do not take for granted my right to vote, my right to an education, my right to practice or refuse to practice the religion of my choice, or my right to keep other people’s stupid ideas off my body. No woman should take these things for granted, nor should we allow other women to do without these rights.

Third, don’t expect me to play nice if you push me to be something I’m not. I make no bones about my personal beliefs. I am an atheist and a Zen Buddhist (for those of you wondering, Zen Buddhism is not a religion, it’s a practice, and it has nothing to do with any idea of God). If you ask me to say grace at the dinner table, you will get what you get.

And that’s my little rant for today.

This is a link to a picture of cartoon I did while at the podcasters and webcomics party at Balticon this past May.  Just a quick little drawing in the midst of much happy madness   The cartoon above was done by Brandon Danger Hill.

Cynical Woman cartoon at Balticon (picture taken by the always wonderful Chris Lester of the Metamor City podcast).

I will happily exercise my butt off over the holiday season, but Ah refuse, Ah say Ah refuse to give up my favorite holiday foods. In fact, I plan to discover some new favorites this year. How about you?

Holiday baking and other cooking starts in earnest this coming weekend. I don’t know what we’ll make yet, but I’m thinking of either a cake, candy, or some cookies. Whatever the kids and I decide on.

I love this time of year!

Oy, I hurt. I had this brilliant idea that I could do the text for the cartoon in Adobe, which would look much better than my own hand lettering. But then I got the cartoon scanned in and I thought, “Hey, if I can do the lettering in Photoshop, why not do the screen tones too? I know I’ve got a tutorial on that somewhere!” Several hours later…

I’m kicking myself because I should have just done the lettering and let it go at that, but nooooooo! I had to do the screen tones. And then I made the mistake of resizing the image down and then I saved it over the larger version of the file!! That hurts because now if I ever want to edit this particular episode again, I’ll have to start all over from the beginning, scanning in the line work and then adding the text and then adding the screen tones…

Ugh.

So anyway, I have a question. Right now, I’m resizing the cartoon to 1200×410 pixels. This is the size you see after you click on the thumbnail. I’ve got a giant flat screen monitor, so I have no idea really if this is too small or too large for anyone else viewing the cartoon. Let me know if you’d like to see the cartoon a little larger, or smaller, because the size I shrink things down to affects how the screen tones work (and yes, I’m just stupid enough to try that technique again, because in spite of the time I wasted this evening, I really like how this turned out).

Enjoy your Halloween!